Crazy Assed Hardware

I lay in bed but I can't sleep.

Everyone settles down and grows silent, but I'm up and watching the soft glow of Igor's laptop play across his features as he sits up in his bed. If I'm not sleepy then why am I lying down?

I get up again, plug that fucking dead fish of a drive into my baby and fuck around. I fuck around until I'm pretty fucking confident that I've exceeded the fucking limitations of the fucking operating system and I've just thrown $130.00 hard earned fucking bucks out the fucking window. I surf the web and find a hard drive cradle for the bitch. I'll install her into the laptop then. I'll not lose this fight. I'm the god of computers! Yeah right.

I surf to the hard drive manu- facturer's site, Western Digital, and when there I find some 'Installation tools'. Apparently Windows alone cannot initialize one of these bitches. It takes a 'tool' to do the job completely. But nothing says that. Nothing in the box, no hardwired instruction on the drive. Nothing. I download the tool, install it, run it, and BAM, the drive perks up and responds. All is good in the universe.

Shit, I was never so overjoyed. I wanted to take my shorts off, and jump... well, you know that story. I started to work immediately, moving huge folders of data over to the new drive, relieving the pressure on the old. One folder actually took ten minutes to move. It was filled with the photographs from my camera. Two years of photos.

I then grew tired and packed away my gear and fell asleep. Like a child on Christmas, I wanted to fall asleep fast so that I could wake the next morning and play with that drive. I was hopping crazy. I wake the next morning and the first thing that I do is put up that drive again. And check my email. I get one from the website that I'm now a staff reporter for. It reads:

hey Hobobob,

"Welcome to the team and a big congratulation and thanks.
You can access your email at [redacted].
Your email will be [redacted].
Please contact us if you have any problems so we can correct them."

Hot damn!! I tell you, I was getting kinda worried about the guys. They never contacted me and they didn't send me the update information to send my articles to. I was left in the lurch. You know how my mind works, I'm always thinking the worst of everything. This is no different. But it looks like everything is full speed ahead. And now that I've got four articles under my belt, I should be able to stay ahead of the quota unless they don't like the idea. Then I'm behind the eight ball. WAAAAY behind the eight ball.

I'm also writing this fast to get done before Wendy, the Wicked Witch of the West flies through the dorm, to tell me to turn off my baby before there is some punitive action taken against me. Don't you just love the rules here? I get up so early that they can't even enforce them. But if they catch me should I stay late, then that's a different story.

They fail to catch me as usual and I go to their stupid Morning Meeting, where everyone stands around and hunches their shoulders. Where are the fucking important announcements? Where are the spine tingling notices? Nothing, except 'have a nice day.' I'll give you a fucking nice day. I grab my meds..which is another story. Well, I'll tell it now. I hate my evening meds because frankly I have to get on long line of idiots to get at them when Nurse Gail is the nurse on duty. She is the slowest motherfucker next to Nurse Helen. These two cripples go so slow with the dispensing of the medication that a line of morons form. I can't stand standing on this stupid line. So instead I go and take a seat on my bed. Once I take out my baby and get comfortable, I don't feel like getting up to take medication. Well, sometimes the Tech's catch me and tell me to go upstairs. And when I get there, Nurse Gail is fuming, because she has to stay later to give me my shit.

Ahh ha ha! Payback's a bitch ain't it. So now, in the morning, I'm standing behind just one moron, and Nurse Gail is taking her agonizingly long time to dispense the drugs. I can't help but think she's trying to get back at me. But I don't care. I hope she is, because that means I'm getting under her skin like she does mine. So, Nurse Gail holds me up from hitting the Way and getting to work. What kind of shit is that?

But, what the fuck! I wait patiently and get my meds and run.

I spend my time on the job. At lunch I go down to third avenue to photograph the homes there for my story on PlaNYC. I'm running ahead with that and intend to stay ahead. Tomorrow I'm going to send the article out for publishing. My first one. Shit, I'm excited.

I sit in Starbucks smiling. There is a very good chance that I'm going to be published, and regularly at that.

I smile harder.

Hobobob