Fates, Furies, and Muses Staring Outwards

.

"...as for going out to meet hot women, the whole thing is a pathetic joke.  what i believe you want is a friend, companion, lover, someone you can talk to, someone who understands and inspires you, someone you can relate to as human, not just nice tits and ass.  my god, men are so pathetic.  excuse me but it's true."

Wow, that's someone with a real chip. Well, everyone is entitled to their opinions, so I don't have a problem with it. But I don't happen to agree. Not because I'm a man, but because I came from the culture of the club. I was a shark in a lake filled with guppies. Now you may say: Not you Hobobob. But yeah. Before I started my career as a hobo, I was a playboy. Yep. And I know the mechanism that functions in the minds of the two animals that meet in a bar. Let me give you my slant. Now I'm not saying that this is the gospel. You can take it or leave it, but it's happened to me, so that's how it is in my book.

Firstly, I can't see how you can meet hot women if you DON'T go out? If you don't get out of the house and go where the Hot Women are, you'll never find one. Now I remember the time when my mother said, "Hobo, you can find nice women in the church or the Laundromat." So I did them both. One, if you want to get laid anytime soon, skip the church. That's just a heads up for all you guys out there. NOW, if you're a Christian man that feels that sex before marriage is a sin, you'll probably find what you are looking for in a church. All I found were stacks of frumpettes, and after dating a few, I got tired of them trying to convert me from being a pervert.

The Laun- dromat.  Well, women there are usually older, frumpy, dressed in their jogging suits and are married. I have never, ever met a single woman in a Laundromat. I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU CAN'T. Shit, you might even find a Pamela Anderson doing her laundry, I'm just saying, that in my book, you can forget that shit. Mothers, married women, frumps and bitches annoyed to hell with the washing machines, that will take that shit out on you if you even try to make a pass at them. They're not in the mood for meeting a man when their drawers are spinning in the dryer.

What does a man want? Sure he wants a com- panion, lover, blah, blah, blah, someone of substance. But women don't walk around in a club with badges on their chests with their MENSA scores. Early in the evening they get up, go in the bathroom and doll themselves up for hours. Then they go to their closets and dress themselves for hours, and then, when everything is perfect, they head off to the club. They make themselves hot. WHY? To talk to their girlfriends all night? If they do, they're stupid. Get a box of chocolates, a bottle of wine, a chickflick and go to your girlfriend's house and sit on the couch watching some other woman find, by some absurd chance meeting, the man of her dreams. Thereby wishing you could do the same and not realizing that ITS A MOVIE SCRIPT!

NO, women doll themselves up to be attractive to men in the club. They want to be the hottest piece of ass there of the night, and when they walk into the club they establish where they are at in the pecking order of women present and take their place accordingly. Now, like I said, there's nothing obvious about the woman at the end of the bar but the signals that she's sending out which is "I've spent all evening on my hair and clothing for you to notice me!" She's not in there reading a book on particle physics. When a man sees the woman at the end of the bar, do you really think he makes the choice to go talk to her because he knows shes a good conversationalist? Nope. He goes over there because she STIRS HIS FUCKING LIBIDO. End of story. If men are pathetic, then women are in the same boat, because they lure, and men follow. Men look at everything, her dress and grooming JUST LIKE SHE DOES, and he's looking at her figure. That means her face, tits and ass. If she has meager or low T&A, it's called a "Lack of Funs". Hey, I didn't make that shit up.

He makes his move BECAUSE SHE IS HOT. Simple. And she MAKES HERSELF AS HOT AS SHE CAN. That's the lure of attraction. If you think I'm wrong, go to a club looking like shit. Either you men or women, and see how successful you'll be. Don't take it from me. Now when he sits down and she finds him desirable enough even to TALK TO, they feel each other out. However women earnestly believe that at this point the game is one of rapport between the two. Seeing if they are compatible, if they are someone to talk to, someone to relate to and inspire, blah blah blah. Well, the real rub is that THEY BOTH ARE NOT BEING THEMSELVES. If you think he or she is, you're lost in the sauce. BOTH of them are trying to make a favorable impression. As they say, they are 'putting their best foot forward.' Why? Because each wants the other to think favorably of them.

But here's the trick. Nine out of ten times each are looking to get laid. Sooner or later. Some women count three dates before they jump the cock. Others, on that very same that night they'll take you out back and blow you. If you don't think men are working this angle, if you don't think a man is being charming to woo himself into your pants, you are being intellectually dishonest with yourself. C'mon, don't make excuses ladies. You go to clubs to get a bump and feel too. How many of you honestly had a night where you intentionally drank too much to get you inhibitions out of the way and did something that you later called 'stupid'? I'm talking about meeting some handsome Axe body spray dude at a club, thought his body and face was the hottest thing next to George Clooney and went out back or in his car and got fingered or fucked. C'mon, be honest, how many times?

Women want sex just as badly as men, and they know that they can go to a club and get some relatively easy, and that's because MEN WANT TO FUCK. They know it and we know it. It's no fucking secret and we all fall under the umbrella. A man, just learning how to pick up women gets his horn honked behind some garbage cans out back or in his car, and he then expects it from every woman that he talks to and pours on the charming act.

Here's the thing. Some- times. Yeah, I said it. Some- times, there's a hot start to a relation- ship. Phone numbers are exchanged afterwards, and the outrageous, off the wall, gorilla sex continues. WE CALL THAT A BOOTY CALL. And after a number of hits, the fucking couple finds out that they even like each other and a real relationship with all the above blah, blah, blah ensues. Does this shit happen often. NO. But it does happen.

Stop fooling yourselves. Men and women both had their little black books before we could save numbers on our cell phones. And men and women used to put stars next to their names to grade if they were decent fucks and booty calls. We as a species want to fuck each other. It's programmed in our genes, and if we don't understand that simple fact, we are fooling ourselves.

So, you women, feel good being tramps, and you guys, enjoy being dogs. Just fuck each other. I believe that if there was more fucking and less fighting, wars on this planet would end and there would be peace in our life time.

So do I think the statement at the beginning is true? It flies in the face of conventional wisdom. It takes only a minute of your time to check it out for yourselves, be you men or women. And that is all the hobowisdom that I have for you today. If you want more detailed information about male and female interaction in the club scene, or anywhere for that matter, drop me a question at hobobob@rocketmail.com.

Remember, I'm there for you.

Hobobob