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"I am sister Ana Maria Alberghetti and I must say that there has been a lot of speculation in the Vatican as to which direction Hobobob will be going in when he dies. He claims that his momma says he's going to Hell, whereas the Devil himself is saying that he doesn't want him. When asking St. Peter if his name was on the list for the Pearly Gates, he said 'Fuck No!' And the Governor of New Jersey, Mr. Christie says no fucking way are they taking him if he dies, so the question now is: Is purgatory the answer, or will Hobobob become immortal? The answer is still up in the air, until then, to avoid a controversy, pray this fool doesn't die and don't tell Big Mike where the Hell he is....oops, I mean where the fuck he is, because so far he is NOT going to Hell."
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