Outside Influences Inside

Directionless.

That's how I feel some days. I got a letter from my editor. I'm behind on my articles for the online magazine. I haven't been sending them forward. Neither have I been doing anything. I'm just bullshitting with people on IRC. I've got to get on the stick. I wrapped up one of my articles in twenty minutes and sent it through. Then I sent out emails to lock up another interview...which looks like there will be a problem. The hosts are having a little problem. This is not good for me. But it looks like I'll just have to either wait, come up with a new article idea, or die. I don't like the last prospect much.... so I'd better get on the stick and get another article in the pipe.

As for IRC: The people there get more and more stranger. Further and further out there. You see those people on the Jerry Springer show? Well, that's what some...not all, mind you...but some are like. They are almost scary in fact. Some of the things that come out of their mouths...or off their fingers...will cause you pause. It's just the things that they do are out of this world, and what they actually get involved with. And it's easy to claim that they are liars, but the truth of the matter is is that they don't need to lie, and that they hook up amongst themselves often enough that they don't need you to be talking to them, much less believe them.

But goddamn if these people are not more fun than surfing the web. I'm enthralled with the characters "in channel". These people make me feel at home every time I'm on. I have grown to love them. They make my small, boring world somewhat much, much larger. I am in a wonderland of people, albeit doing strange things amongst themselves. They are a wilderness of personalities. Because of them I'm never alone. I am happy.

I get up and turn on my laptop. Today, I am off the clock, meaning no appoint- ments. I stay naked off my bed, I skip the coffee and get to my emails and get on IRC. It's my breakfast this morning. It melts my day down...until about mid afternoon, my room intercom buzzes. Yeah? "Can you come down for a meeting?" Alright, I reply tiredly. I say goodnight to my friends on IRC and get dressed. I am too tired, or lazy, for this. I wandered downstairs to the public room and tenants are already having a meeting about what's going on in the building. Stupid stuff...like don't change the locks on the door, don't throw trash out of the window, we'll be getting our mail boxes soon. But some of the dumb questions that were coming from my fellow tenants was enough for me to sneak back out and head upstairs. It was just like being in the middle of preschoolers, listening to the teacher in the class, and asking dumb questions.

I couldn't handle it anymore. I wanted snappy, funny, witty conver- sation. I wanted IRC. Text was still scrolling in the three channels that I was on...THREE mind you. I can follow the conversations in THREE chatrooms now. It's called co-channelling and some channels allow you to do it, and some don't. You can tell by putting in a simple WHOIS statement before a name and it'll tell you everything about the user. Especially what channels they're on. You can get KICKED and BANNED from some channels because of it. But these channels are cool with it. There's no jealousy, no competition. Just friends meeting.

I strip and sit. Getting back on and enjoying the company of friends. The talk? About Swine Flu and the Kentucky Derby.

Oh...and which is better for ass fucking your best friends wife...lube or no lube? All of the women of the channel say no lube. Because she's a bad girl.

Like I said. Sometimes, the Jerry Springer show.

Hobobob