"Hobobob, you have no clue about women. Women are more resilient and stronger than you believe. You need to go to Hell for your grossly sexist attitude!" Okay reader, I have been corrected...well maybe not by you though. Your counter-argument is as weak as tissue paper. Instead, I have been corrected by the MEDIA concerning women. Well, that is a touchy subject which is hard to understand, but you will have to to understand what I'm talking about.
I'm not changing my tune IN THE LEAST. So, go home and cry. But, I have to say, today I spent the entire day watching movies where women are depicted in the most improbable way possible. I swear to you, it's like when I see a man stand up to a gun. I wait for the ridiculous to begin. Better yet, when a man has a stab or bullet wound, then let the comedy cavalcade begin! Yeah, suspend your disbelief, because what occurs next is absolute fantasy. So then, Hobobob, how are you corrected about women through the very same process that you so condemn...the media?
Okay.... push a BITCH into a corner with her life and the fireworks WILL begin. AND DON'T fucking touch her child because she WILL kill you even if you have a gun. Bitches are unstoppable. Oh, how can I come to this conclusion? Well, I was watching the improbable like I said. I swear to you. I watched a movie entitled HIDE, and it was the most ridiculous piece of shit that I had ever seen. Case in point: A 90 pound girl, so little and light that you can stretch her arms out over a crucifix, put paper on her back, wrap rope around her waist and sail her like a kite. Well, in this movie, she meets a redneck truck driver who follows her into a bathroom to rape her. Let me describe him. Over three hundred pounds to be sure. His overwhelming gut will attest to that. Arms like tree trunks, bearded and absolutely dangerous.
Now, if I met a guy like that that wanted to rape me I know I would have to die because a tussle with him would mean that I would be taking it in the ass after a lot pain. He can clearly break every bone in a man's body, easily. But get this. This little lightweight girl beats the shit out of him in the bathroom and had to be taken off of him by...guess what? A 150 pound guy. Can you imagine that shit? A 300 pound monster can be put down by her, but a 150 pound man can easily constrain her. Okay, now do you get it? Pure Hollywood fantasy.
So I laugh and laugh. The rest of the movie I then discard, and it ends so poorly that I'm sorry that I wasted my time watching it. I could have cried. Then I watched another movie called BITCH SLAP and I have to tell you, in the first ten minutes these three women are in a desert and are so creative in torturing a man that I had to turn it off. Not for being so stupid, but I couldn't handle how he was being fucked up. I mean, it really does seem campy and stupid in the beginning, but this shit turns serious as a motherfucker by the first half hour. I mean, when they crushed the guy's hand and then shot off his dick...well, I stopped there.
Take it from me ladies, guys do not like watching their life long members being abused, especially torn off by a 45 caliber slug. Okay, let me whet your whistle. Take it like this. Nine motherfuckers with weapons that you will not believe, but very believable, absolutely LEVEL Las Vegas. I'm talking about saying goodbye to buildings, florescent light sources, special forces, and the local police dared not show their face. That's when this movie got fucking interesting. I don't want to tell you too much, but three of these nine were the craziest bitches you have ever seen in your life. These are the psychopaths that torture the man in the beginning.
Like I said, I turned the movie off and watched another one because the beginning was so sexist and unsettling but I liked the way the movies displayed tits and ass from the beginning. So much so that you THINK it's over the top excessive. I now understand the reason for this. The writers of the story want you to think that this is a fucking bimbo movie. A very well laid trap, don't fall for it. These bitches suck Satan's dick and will kill you so many times that Christ can't resurrect you enough. Take it from me...you do NOT want to fuck with these three women. And the horrible part of the movie is? That except for one tiny scene, it was completely believable.
Now, have you EVER seen a Quentin Tarrantino movie in your life? Okay, this makes Reservoir Dogs look like it was written by a homosexual four year old. These bitches taught me something absolutely new about women...and I know it to be a fact. Women have a MUCH HIGHER pain threshold than men. These bitches in BITCH SLAP prove that shit to you, because they wipe the men OUT of the picture almost halfway through the movie. Then, it is what it get's it's name from. BITCH SLAP.
Now, when I was in high school, the most turned on thing that I had ever seen in my life was two girls in a fight. Hold on. I'm not being a jerk here, but when you watch tits and ass in motion, its so much fun. And by the way women cartwheel their arms, weakening their blows, it's pathetic. To me, as a fifteen year old, the only purpose of two girls fighting was to turn all the boys on. Well, that was until six years ago...until the Internet.
I don't know if you know it or not, but there are some heavily hit websites that do even better than mine when it comes to readers. Shit, I used to go to them often. They are called something like 'bitches fighting' or something like that. I clicked on it one day and learned a really good lesson. These... I guess you can call them White Trash girls...were having it out in the streets. Yeah, and being videotaped. Now I've watched the more masculine HOLLYWOOD movie EVERY WHICH WAY BUT LOOSE, with Clint Eastwood about men fist-fighting, and then I watched real, bare-knuckled men fist-fighting on the Internet. But none of these compared to the girls that I watched on 'bitches fighting.'
Why? Because a male's delivery system...their fists, contain more kinetic energy that a woman's. Okay, to you guys that failed science in class, just get it like this. A man running at five miles an hour meets a car traveling five miles an hour, who wins? Well if you guessed right it's the car, because it is carrying more inertia due to kinetic energy. It takes MORE energy to propel a two ton car at five miles per hour than a man. A man would be flattened instantly. That's largely why a punch from a woman is so weak, because there is not enough kinetic energy behind it. Our muscle density is greater than theirs by two to one.
Now get this. Two men are delivering TWICE as much kinetic energy with each blow than a woman, so the punches have more force and more pain. Then, add to the fact that a man has a much LOWER pain threshold than a woman and what you get is a very short, very violent fight. Very short. Now imagine women. Higher pain threshold, lower kinetic energy...jeezus, you are talking about a REAL knock down drag out fight. They can deliver pain much longer than men, and absorb it. I hate to say this, but it will both amaze you and shock you to see one of these fights.
To really kick off the ball, women don't fight like they did when I was in school. Before, they cartwheeled their arms, clawing like cats, hence the term 'Catfight', NOW, believe me, women FIGHT with their FISTS. So consider this...a WOMAN will fight you like a man, and FAIL She will strike at your face, nose, chest, abdomen. Ha ha ha! BUT a bitch will fuck you up. She will knock your balls into your throat, blacken your eye, or much worse, shoot your dumb ass. After BITCH SLAP I've learned two things...1) leave bitches the FUCK alone, and 2) you can only fight a bitch with a bitch. All you people out there remember the end of the movie ALIENS with Sigourney Weaver, right? That big, scary motherfucking alien momma was NOT put down by some tough-as-nails space MARINE. It was put down by the only ultimate weapon in our arsenal, another bitch. Did you learn the lesson yet guys?
Guys, don't think I'm kidding you at this point. I am deadly serious. BITCHES rule. The reason why is that they KNOW that they can't overpower you, so they become creative in the most scariest way you can possibly imagine. Trust me, watch BITCH SLAP and you'll agree. Not only is this shit believable, it's a motherfucking warning. LEAVE BITCHES ALONE. I'm telling you, the men are so wounded that they DON'T want to get the fuck up to do anything else. The fact is that in this movie I had no conceivable IDEA that what they did would work or rather would come into a woman's mind. But let me tell you, not only do they do some unspeakable things to men, they even get down to gouging their teeth into women's groins. Think about that. Now this is BITCH AGAINST BITCH, and they bite down on their sensitive reproductive organs like they are Big Macs. Trust me, you will LEARN that BITCHES are two things. 1) they don't fuck around, and 2) they are HIGHLY creative.
Now, going on. The story is so tight and racing that the dumb male that I am, I had to watch it THREE times to put the pieces together. Why? Is it because I failed so many courses in school that it's pathetic? Nope. Because women MASTER men in black hearted DEVIOUSNESS. It takes a dozen flashbacks for you to even piece together the tangled web of deceit. Women, due to their lack of sheer physical power can confuse us men with TITS AND ASS. Trust me, not only do they do it to the men in the movie, they'll do it to YOU watching the damn film! Men are led about by their dicks, and in this movie, lose them. Women are led about by their desire to FUCK OTHER WOMEN. And the most vicious of the two WIN. This is the ALPHA BITCH.
So, after watching this really scary movie that like I said, which makes ALL of Quentin Tarrantino's movies look terribly weak, I've come to a conclusion. Women see the world as a scary place... BITCHES, on the other hand, eat the world for lunch. They tear a hole in the fabric of reality, and in this movie, YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT IT. Because it is so REAL that in the beginning you are caught up in the stupidity of hot, half naked women...and then you find out that they are so highly evolved that they have made you into THEIR BITCH, and with a blink, they can end your sorry assed life in the most horrific way imaginable.
I know that I'm recanting a lot, but I'm really, truly afraid after this movie. I suggest that all men see it, because it is worse than THE USUAL SUSPECTS because there are so many twists and turns that you will be lost in the first FIVE minutes. Why? Because you are too stupid to toss aside the abundance of tits and ass. I'm telling you, an abundance! It reaches the point of stupidity, until you wake up from your delirium and concentrate on the story. Then, like a fool, you find out that because of hot pussy, you have been flatfooted, and you feel sorry for all the men in the movie that have done the same, and can relate to their fucking deaths. They HAD no clue. But bitches, with nothing to loose, will always win.
First, you find out in the story that they are part of a crew of losers that lay waste to Las Vegas. Okay, so that's pretty bad assed, you say to yourself. Well, this volatile mix has got to go somewhere and settle scores...so where does the picture take place? Everyone converges in a barren wasteland of desert, like Death Valley, with nothing but lifeless surroundings in all directions. Then the shapely legs come out, the firm, upturned tits come out, rock hard asses come out, weapons come out, the bullets, the explosions, the knives, the fists, the teeth and finally when there is nothing left...BITCHES CLAIM YOUR SOUL over what is left of a hell scorched Earth, smoldering with fires, debris and blood.
BITCH SLAP has changed my world view. I'm not lying or joking. Then, I had to find out who wrote this fucking nightmare. Firstly, they use a phrase from Joseph Conrad in the beginning, praising, or rather condemning MAN for his capacity for evil. You will laugh at this later when the movie ends. Then, just from a technical standpoint, they have in the credits at the end certain makeup specialists and instead of calling them that, they call them Hematoma, Laceration, and Contusion make up artists. Just to warn you, this is NOT your usual fuck everybody up movie. They had specialists for the wounds to make them real, and god help me...they ARE very real. These bitches take an ENORMOUS amount of punishment, but they rely on men taking the vital moments to put a bullet through their eye to instead ogle at their bobbing breasts. Thereby giving the Bitches the opportunity to rip their bloody spines out of their assholes.
Lastly, I noticed that there is NO writer for the film...but instead it is the ST. IGNATIUS HOME FOR WAYWARD GIRLS that penned this tome. Now if the fact that the screenwriters of this movie DO NOT want to be identified doesn't scare the shit out of you men...then this is where you get off the train. Stop watching the movie NOW. It takes a very hurt and vicious psychosis to bring half this shit to light. Whoever wrote this has dealt intimately with the workings of bitches, or ARE bitches, and want to scream out bloody murder. Okay, did I make you feel fear yet?
It is unusually funny, but it is a true fact that you CAN shoot a man in the chest or appendage and he will most likely either squirm uncontrollably or black out from the pain. But a woman will still retain her conscious ability. She might jump up and run were WE will most likely wither. Why is this? Like I said earlier, PAIN THRESHOLD. It comes from the simple fact that women are FUCKING DERANGED. Oh, you think that the hobo is lying to you? Check this out.
You men out there. You know that I had told you that you DO NOT want to experience the local gross trauma of a bullet wound, right? Well, just for those who doubt that, think of this. If a man struck you in the back of your head with a hammer, shattering your skull, how many dances on the dance floor will you make? Better yet, how far down the block do you think you'll go? Well, that is called Cranium Blunt Force Trauma. Very light compared to GROSS physical penetrating trauma. Like I said, you do NOT want to experience this in your life. Why? Because you have NOTHING to relate it to it your entire existence. You have no reference point.
Okay, now check this out. During childbirth, women experience a WIDE array of sheer pain that is literally OFF THE SCALE. And she will go through it. Trust me, you would NOT like to. I never heard of the word 'conniption' until I listened to Bill Cosby talk about his wife's first birth, where she said, imagine pulling your lower lip over your head. Frankly guys, I can't. Can you? Okay, she experiences pain over the mark when having a baby and when they hand the child to her, all is well. BULLSHIT. I will be fucking up everyone in the delivery room until they understood the pain that I was put through.
Well, then, she comes to you in bed afterward, and she jumps on YOUR dick and asks you for ANOTHER baby. What? Are you mad? Didn't the pain of the last one teach you a lesson? Guys, for later understanding...Hell no. A woman's pain threshold is so unbelievably high that it's impossible to register it. And for them, their short term memory forgets it RIGHT AWAY. It is NEVER imprinted in memory. Let me assure you that if a man gave birth to a child, he would NEVER do that shit again. And yet a woman can do this shit over and over. The most craziest thing that you have ever had to swallow guys, no?
So, you have to drive pain into a woman TWICE as much as a man to make them faint. You want another insane Hollywood fantasy? Women faint at the SIGHT of something scary. Not true. YOU'LL probably faint first because the idea of the pain that is approaching is so much so that your brain will try to shield you from it, thus blacking you out. She, on the other hand, will be holding the fucking gun at the threat. Especially if it's like a Stephen King Unimaginable Horror. Trust me, in real life, you will be dependent on your BITCH. If she is a woman...well then prepare to DIE. But if she is a BITCH, this woman will indeed save your sorry ass. Trust me, she will become so creative against the most inconceivable threat that you will be amazed. This bitch has been giving Satan blowjobs, trust me, she's learned a thing or two.
I'm I prasing the movie BITCH SLAP. Hell yeah. Don't watch it at your own risk. Like in a Godzilla movie, at the end Godzilla comes face to face with the monster wrecking Tokyo. In BITCH SLAP, the final face off is between TWO bitches. Listen to me, I don't think the rank and file woman is up to this challenge. But the Bitch does this with vim and vigor. She lives for this shit. She thrives on this shit. She will WIN this shit.
William Congreve warned the shit out of men about this. He said: "Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned / Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned." Congreve was NOT fucking around. Hey guys. Do yourself a favor and take a little education. Hey, watch some tits and ass, and enjoy the silly sights...it's all to throw you off...and it will. There is nothing like a woman showing her naughty bits. But remember, these are pure, white hot bitches. They tear the fuck through EVERYONE in the movie, and if you were among the men, as well as the just plain women....you'd wish you were home. Fuck these crazy motherfuckers. My policy now, when it comes to women...differentiate the women from the bitches. For your own sake.
A man holding a gun at my face? If my girl was a bitch...I'd feel sorry for him. The coroner will not be able to identify his body. As an added warning, they won't even be able to FIND yours! Oh, and finally, BITCH SLAP isn't about slapping women, but instead, slapping men back to reality and proving that the male of the species can be made into bitches by bitches if you're stupid. And guys, unless you're Einstein....you're probably stupid.Hobobob
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