Senseless Things Spoken

"Who is it!!!"

Comes from the other side of the door. It's me Igor, open up. Igor snatches open the door, "Hobobob, I was just ringing your doorbell." Oh you were. I'm completely surprised. "Were you there?" I'm dressed in my coat, Igor, what do you think? "So what are you doing here?" Well why were you knocking on my door. "The Internet is still down," he frowns. "I tried getting on and it's still down." No shit. Mind if I come in and call Time Warner Cable?

He opens the door, "sure, sure." His room is a clutter, clothes strewn on the floor and every- where, dishes in the sink, shit on the counter, bed unmade. I don't have my paperwork on me though, I tell him. He reaches down and picks up a shirt. "Let's go up to your place." I nod, that's cool. We walk up to my crib and file in. I set up my computer, he calls Time Warner Cable. "Hello," he asks.
"Time Warner cable, may I help you?" It was a woman's voice on the speakerphone.
"Hey," Igor begins. "We were scheduled to have a serviceman visit us today and he never came. "
"Okay, give my your account number."
He does.
"Okay, give me you technical support confirm- ation number."
He does.
"Okay, give me your account support confirmation number.
He does.
"Alright, we have you scheduled for service on the 29th of December."
"No," Igor says with alarm. "We were told on Tuesday. Today."
"No, you are scheduled for Tuesday, the 29th of December."
"Oh no, I can't have that. I have finals. I need the Internet. I don't have time for this."
"Well that's what we have, sir."
"I don't believe this shit. You have our money. We pay our bill, and you people are jerking us around with the service."
"I'm not jerking you around, sir."
"You've got to do something. The only service that we have here is the Internet and you people can't even keep that working correctly, and you're telling me that I have to wait an entire week for service. No I don't pay good money for this ma'am."
"Well, we have an emergency service, but you have to call at 8:00 in the morning and you have to have someone there between the hours of 9:00 to 3:00. There is nothing that I can do about it now."
Igor looks up at me. I think about my Metropolitan Hospital appointment, and say screw it, the Internet is more important. I nod, I'll be here.
"Yeah," He says. "We'll have someone here."
"Well if we have a technician in the area tomorrow we'll send him over to check out your connection."
"IF YOU HAVE SOMEONE IN THE AREA!!" Igor screams. "We're making arrange- ments to have someone stay here between 9:00 to 3:00 and you're talking about IF?"
"I'm sorry sir, I'll put a notation that you called and requested emergency service, so that when you call in the morning they'll give you priority."
"Alright," Igor sighs. "This is very important to me. I have finals and I can't wait a week for my Internet. I need to get on."
"We'll I'll see what we can do tomorrow, sir."
"Thank you. Thank you very much."

He hangs up. We make arrange- ments. He stands in the middle of my room. "Want dinner?" Nope, I don't eat after ten. "You want to smoke dope?" No I don't have any on me, I lied. "You want to hang out, do something? Watch a movie in my room?" Naah, I have shit to do on my computer. I'm going to blog. "I'm lonely downstairs." Sorry to hear that. I'm comfortable in my solitude. He nods. "Oh, I was thinking, you should start cutting people off your Internet because they are slowing things down. I'm trying to download movies and it's taking longer and longer." Oh, you're sucking up my throughput downloading movies. "Well my next door neighbor is using Limewire, really sucking up Internet space. You should start cutting people off and just leave me. I'll pay you." I'll let you know when I start cutting people off Igor, and since you're downloading movies, the first person just might be you. He laughs. I'm serious. "Alright, I'll talk to you. Seriously think about cutting people off." Goodnight, Igor.

I sigh, deflating in my chair.

I'm home tomorrow. But I'm getting up early and getting into Starbucks to work on my email and blog before these fuckers have me lock myself up in my self made tomb for the rest of the day, waiting for them not to show.

Waiting for them not to show.

Hobobob